Emotions and Consequences.

We can’t choose the emotions we feel, but we can choose how we respond to them!❤️🙌

👉 Why Are Emotions Important? The emotion we experience at any given moment is more important than you might think. Many of us are able to recognise what emotion we are feeling. But beyond that recognition our emotions are overlooked. However, being in tune with our emotions is super important because they can shape the course of our day/week, essentially our future. This is because they can influence our actions. A stimulus occurs, we feel an emotion in response to said stimuli, and we then act/behave in response to the sentiment.

There has long been a stigma surrounding feeling emotions and sharing emotions with others❌. If a woman feels something historically she was diagnosed with female hysteria, and now she’s told to calm down. If a man shares that he is feeling an emotion, he opens himself up to being perceived as “weak” and “not a real man”. These perceptions are wrong, unhealthy, and damaging. With the potential to lead to serious consequences.

Feeling emotions and allowing yourself to really work with them, rather than burying them deep down inside, can be incredibly difficult for some people. Some of you may feel that you yourself need to “calm down” or you are “weak”. In moments when you doubt whether you’re allowed to feel what you are feeling, I’d like you to think about the following points...

✅ Evolutionary speaking emotions are important because they instill actions. For example, if you see a crocodile, you feel the emotion of scared, so you run as fast as you can. If you didn’t feel that emotion of scared, you wouldn’t feel the need to run and the crocodile might eat you. Therefore, feeling that emotion will have saved your life. ✅ But, equally importantly our emotions allow us to be our true selves. They enable us to be truly authentic. They help us determine what makes us feel good, and what makes us feel uncomfortable. We are able to pursue more comfortable emotions and minimise making decisions that cause uncomfortable emotions, so we can live our best lives. ✅ Being able to identify our emotion and express it to another person, and listen and understand when another person shares with us. This is what helps us to gain a deeper insight and understanding, so we can have more productive interactions and build more meaningful relationships.

👉 What Are The Core Emotions? There are 7 core emotions, these have also been referred to as the “main” emotions and include… 😡 Anger 😨 Fear 😳 Shame 🤢 Disgust 😁 Happiness 😔 Sadness 😮 Surprise

👉 What About Our Other Emotions? All of our other emotions are thought to branch off the original seven core emotions in a sort of emotions wheel. It might be a little bit of an information overload for me to write all of these as there are a lot of emotions. But, I do want to share some with you. I have chosen the happiness and sadness core emotions to detail further...

😔 Sadness 🔴 Guilty - Remorseful or Ashamed 🔴 Abandoned - Ignored or Victimised 🔴 Despair - Powerless or Vulnerable 🔴 Depressed - Inferior or Empty 🔴 Lonely - Abandoned or Isolated 🔴 Bored - Apathetic or Indifferent

😁 Happiness 🔵 Joyful - Liberated or Ecstatic 🔵 Interested - Amused or Inquisitive 🔵 Proud - Important or Confident 🔵 Accepted - Respected or Fulfilled 🔵 Powerful - Courageous or Provocative 🔵 Peaceful - Hopeful or Loving 🔵 Intimate - Playful or Sensitive Optimistic - Inspired or Open

👆 It is important to remember we can feel different emotions at different intensities and for different amounts of time.

👉 Responding to Emotions. Sometimes we can get so consumed by an emotion that we can’t control how we respond. For example, Kate might feel so upset that she goes to bed and stays there until the next afternoon. Or, John might feel so cross that he shouts at a loved one and says something he instantly regrets.

We don’t want to respond to our emotions in an unhelpful way. We want to be responding to our emotions in a helpful way!!✅

So, maybe Kate could have used some tools from her toolbox that she knows work for her and help regulate her emotions. John could have recognised he was too cross to be communicating with anyone at that point in time and informed his loved one that he required time to calm down. He then might have found a guided meditation useful.

✍️ Activity 1: Over the next week, try and keep an emotions journal. It can be beneficial for you to see your emotions and their story written down in front of you. For the uncomfortable emotions, it can help you recognise how you can respond more effectively to those emotions in the future. Allowing you to make positive changes in your life. But, also document the positive emotions. This is so you can see what brings you happiness and what you should be doing more of! If you are unsure of how to do an emotions journal, then I have some suggestions for you. Remember, to tailor this to what suits you as you get more comfortable with the process…

🔶 What is the name of the emotion you felt? (e.g., I felt really anxious) 🔶 How did the emotion motivate you to act? (e.g., I didn’t go to a meal with my friends) 🔶 Did you express this emotion to others, if so, how? (e.g., Yes, I didn’t show up to the meal)

Of course, you can delve much deeper than I have in the above example. You can think about why you felt anxious. Had you had too much caffeine that day? Or, maybe not slept the night before? Then think about if you are happy with the outcome. Yes, attending meals isn't important to you. Or, no you would like to work on being more social so you're disappointed you didn't attend. All different aspects like this are great for you to explore.

👉 Achieving More Pleasurable Emotions in Your Life. Of course, how to bring more positive emotions into your life is individual to each of you. The activity will hopefully help you identify what makes you feel positive emotions! But, there are some general things that you should be trying to do, to put you in the best position for feeling all kinds of good!! Some of these include….

✅ Making sure you get enough sleep. ✅ Trying to exercise a little bit each day (within your limits). ✅ Having a healthy diet. ✅ Practicing mindfulness. ✅ Being mindful of how things like drugs, caffeine and, alcohol impact you. ✅ SCHEDULE TIME TO DO SOMETHING YOU ENJOY.

👉 KEY POINTS. ✍️ Emotions are important and they serve a purpose. ✍️ Sharing your emotions is a STRENGTH, not a weakness. ✍️ Your emotions are valid, even if others disagree. You are allowed to feel what you feel. ✍️ It can be difficult to identify exactly what it is you’re feeling. It’s perfectly okay to need to sit with your emotions for a little while to help work through what exactly it is you're feeling. With time this can become more natural to you. ✍️ Some people find it hard to trust their emotions. A person may feel sad and then instantly think “no I don’t deserve to be sad”. This is often the case if you have had your emotions dismissed by a caregiver or partner. It is ok to work on trusting yourself, this can take some time, but don’t give up, you are worthy.

🤗Remember you are not alone, Happio is here to help you!🤗